S05E01 - Morning After
No: 39 | Season: 5 Episode: 1 | Air Date: 24-Apr-16
On the day after the election Selina thinks she's found a path to victory. Meanwhile, Catherine starts making a behind-the-scenes documentary; Amy isn't sure if she's back on the team; Dan mulls a new career; and Mike and Wendy plan to adopt a baby from China.
Director and Writers
Director: Chris Addison
Story by: David Mandel
Selina: Didn't those founding f**kers ever hear of an odd number?
Ben: Two great Greek contributions to society democracy and getting f**ked up the ass.
Selina: I've tried both and they're way overrated, like jazz.
Mike: I'm gonna be a dad.
Selina: You're a nincompoop. We are in the middle of a tied election. There is no time for some Chinese baby. Cancel it and see if you can get your money back.
Ben: Fortune cookie say you f**k up big-time, round eye.
Director of the Secret Service: Since you became president, we have been looking for a new lead agent for your detail.
Selina: Gosh, I like Bob. I mean, apart from the discolored tooth. But that's obviously not a reason to replace him.
Gary: Can they replace the tooth?
Jonah: This is highly enriched weapons-grade bullshit. How dare she put you in charge of me?
Richard: It's an outrage is what it is.
Jonah: It is an outrage, you know? She's Uncle Dursley and she's got the great wizard Harry Potter living under the staircase. Do you see that? But what happens in the Harry Potter books? He rises up and he kills all the muggles.
Richard: I don't think that's what happens.
Selina: What we have to do is hang a bell on this guy. He's completely off book.
Kent: No, ma'am, I think that means that he's learned all his lines and he no longer needs a script.
Selina: No, he's off book.
Sue: Off the hook?
Selina: No, he's deviating from the book of the things that he should do.
Ben: You mean off the rails.
Selina: Fine, he's off the rails.
Amy: Well, let's make Tom economy czar.
Selina: Yeah. We'll czar him. That'll give him something to do.
Amy: Whatever useless, vain, vapid thing you're doing right now, drop it.
Dan: Well, I am enjoying a delicious sandwich made even more delicious by the fact that there's a homeless guy watching me eat it.
Selina: You can get rid of this Skittle that's embedded in my face.
Gary: She's also got a mole near her Spanx line and it's hidden...
Selina: Yeah, and this thing up my ass has got to get removed, too.
Selina: I don't mean this to sound insensitive, but don't you think that mudslides are the funniest kind of natural disasters?
Ben: I've always been partial to sinkholes. You know, ah!
Selina: Those are hilarious.
Kent: Nature's trapdoor.
Notes and Trivia
Morgan Smith, who played Candi Caruso, is better known as "Red", the Wendy's spokesperson.
In the scene after Selina's speech, the onscreen CNN headline reads: "Fourth largest market drop ever as President address nation." The word "address" should probably read "addresses".
|Starring||Julia Louis-Dreyfus||Selina Meyer|
|Starring||Anna Chlumsky||Amy Brookheimer|
|Starring||Tony Hale||Gary Walsh|
|Starring||Reid Scott||Dan Egan|
|Starring||Timothy Simons||Jonah Ryan|
|Starring||Matt Walsh||Mike McLintock|
|Starring||Kevin Dunn||Ben Cafferty|
|Starring||Sufe Bradshaw||Sue Wilson|
|Starring||Gary Cole||Kent Davison|
|Starring||Sam Richardson||Richard Splett|
|Guest Starring||Hugh Laurie||Tom James|
|Guest Starring||Scott Adsit|
|Guest Starring||Evan Arnold||White House Reporter #5|
|Guest Starring||Diedrich Bader|
|Guest Starring||Craig Cackowski||Cliff|
|Guest Starring||Clea Duvall|
|Guest Starring||Nigel Gibbs|
|Guest Starring||Peter Grosz|
|Guest Starring||Phil Reeves|
|Guest Starring||Sarah Sutherland|
|Guest Starring||Wayne Wilderson|
|Co-Starring||Todd Aaron Brotze|
|Co-Starring||Brendan Caleb Calton||TV Tech|
|Co-Starring||Nick Clifford||Event Coordinator|
|Co-Starring||Matt Gulbranson||Secret Service Agent #1|
|Co-Starring||Deb Hiett||White House Reporter #1|
|Co-Starring||Brian Michael Jones||Secret Service Agent #2|
|Co-Starring||Andrew Thacher||White Man #1|
|Co-Starring||Ursula Whittaker||White Woman #1|
|Co-Starring||G. Maximilian Zarou||Hotel Manager|