Veep Quotes

Dan: Hey, Jonah. You know, buddy, I have been mean and I'm sorry.
Jonah: What kind of idiot do you think I am?
Dan: Is there a choice?
Jonah: I only have one asset that you would be interested in and that's my Uncle Jeff's bucket of votes.
Dan: Great! So you'll get us Uncle Jeff?
Jonah: Oh no, I'm just gettin' started. I want West Exec parking for the Cube, and I want mess hall privileges.
Dan: No. That's that's impossible.
Jonah: Well, then you better "possible-ize" it, Dan. And I want somebody that works for me. I want an assistant, a gopher, a servant.
Dan: Oh, you want a Jonah?
Jonah: Yeah! I want a Jonah. And henceforth they will no longer be known as Jonahs. They'll be known as Jimmys or Pepes or Sarahs or whatever the f**k that person's name turns out to be. And you can't hire anyone named Jonah, okay? See, I'm on to you already.
Dan: Shit! I gotta go.
Jonah: You know what? They should be called Dans.

Quote from S03E10 - New Hampshire


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