Veep Quotes

Selina: Who do you think you are? Gary Antoinette? Did somebody make you First Lady, because I don't remember marrying you Gary! I don't remember f**king you in Niagara Falls! I think I'd remember that!
Gary: Ma'am, I'm really sorry for the painting, and I'm really sorry for the spending, but you have to understand--
Selina: Oh, shut up! Just shut up! You are unimportant! And you have suckered onto me like some sort of a car window Garfield!
Gary: That is not true ma'am.
Selina: You think you're some sort of a big shot here? Oh, my God, you are not a big shot here, Gary! You're a middle-aged man who sanitizes my tweezers! God!
Gary: You're wrong.
Selina: Excuse me?!
Gary: When's Catherine's birthday?
Selina: June 8th--
Gary: Ninth.
Selina: Ninth!
Gary: Which senator's daughter's in rehab?
Selina: You're out of line, missy!
Gary: Geldray. What are you wearing tomorrow?
Selina: I don't know!
Gary: I do. I'm your calendar, I'm your Google, I'm your Wilson the volleyball!
Selina: No you're not!
Gary: Yes I am!!
Selina: NO YOU'RE NOT!
Gary: I have broken my body for you!
Selina: Oh, come on....
Gary: I've let myself be laughed at, I've let myself be humiliated, but I'm happy to do it! Most times, you don't even know that I exist, BUT I AM FU**ING EVERYTHING TO YOU!!
Selina: Oh, I am so happy to find somebody else to get me my hand cream!
Gary: Okay go!
Selina: Yeah!
Gary: Can you find somebody else who did what I did?!
(long pause, Gary's face turns to horror as realizes what he just implied)
Selina: You mean on Labor Day?
Gary: I didn't say that.
Selina: Yeah, you did, you ju- you just said 'Labor Day'.
Gary: I said I would never mention that ever.

Quote from S04E02 - East Wing

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